CI: Owners' Guide and Instruction Manual
by BabyBeaver
Summary: Saw a Teen Titans version and decided to try a CI version. Format came from someone else's fic, who got it from someone else's...
1. BOBBY

**I started reading ****BaiMaoRieji****'s Teen Titans versions and decided, "Hey, why not try others?" So this came about. I was bored and slightly hyper from eating Monster Trail Mix and ice cream (don't ask why, I just did) and…yeah. Thought I'd try it. So I started it July 12, 2008 and kept going back to **_**TITANS: Owners' Guide and Instruction Manual**_** for tips and such.**

**Nothing belongs to me. Seriously. It's all someone else's.**

**And it might not work very well with actual people, but they're characters, right? :)**

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**BOBBY: Owner's Guide and Instruction Manual**

Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of a new, fully automated BOBBY unit. To ensure you get the full benefits of the Detective, please pay close attention to the following instructions.

**Basic Information:**

Name: BOBBY

Date of Manufacture: 40-50 years ago

Place of Manufacture: The East Coast??

Height: We have to look up a lot; we're not quite sure.

Weight: He's rather sensitive about this, so we haven't weighed him yet.

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**Your** **BOBBY**** unit will come with the following accessories:**

One (1) Armani suit

One (1) Leather binder

One (1) Immense vocabulary

One (1) Ridiculous sense of humor

Anything else he can inform you of.

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**Programming:**

Your BOBBY unit is a reasonably versatile unit that can perform various tasks.

**Detective: **(Default Program) All BOBBY units can solve crimes using many different techniques with quite a lot of skill.

**WARNING:** Do not allow your BOBBY unit to return to Tates Correctional Facility or it will end badly for your BOBBY unit.

**Criminal Profiler:** Your BOBBY unit is a crime expert and can show you a thing or two, including appreciating smells.

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**Your BOBBY unit four (4) settings:**

**Detective: **(Basic Setting). He helps the Major Case Squad solve crimes.

**Emo: **Whenever he remembers his past.

**Happy:** Activates whenever he is enjoying himself basically which would include kicking a criminal unit's butt or spending time with an ALEX unit.

**Insane: **If an investigation requires it, your BOBBY unit may pretend to be a "whack job"…

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**Relations with other units:**

Your BOBBY unit may be hostile to strangers at first until he assesses that they are not a threat to him, but is generally compatible with many units once he gets to know them.

**ALEX:** Most compatible unit. ALEX units are totally dedicated to BOBBY units and often work best when your BOBBY unit is in his Emo, Detective, or Happy setting.

**ROSS: **ROSS units get along fairly well with BOBBY units, unless very frustrated with a BOBBY unit…

**DEAKINS: **DEAKINS units tend to like BOBBY units, though not as much as an ALEX unit does.

**NICOLE WALLACE:** We strongly advise against coming near this unit unless you wish to cause mental stress to a BOBBY unit.

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**Cleaning:**

Your BOBBY unit is fully capable of cleaning himself. But if you wish to do it yourself do not machine wash, do not tumble dry, do not hang on the line to dry, and NEVER take away his binder.

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**Energy:**

Since solving crimes and running around uses up a lot of energy, ensure that he is fed thrice daily.

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**Frequently Asked Questions:**

Q: Will my BOBBY unit ever stop rambling?

A: Yes, but it is very unlikely. Once you get a BOBBY unit talking, he will continue talking until A) he feels it's time to stop his lecture or B) you slap or stare at him.

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**Troubleshooting:**

Problem: Your BOBBY unit lost his binder

Solution: Most likely he set it down in order to grab a cup of coffee for an ALEX unit. Have him retrace his steps or get him to ask an ALEX unit, and it will be fine.

Problem: You are having trouble getting your BOBBY unit to shut up.

Solution: Stop trying.

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With proper care and maintenance, your BOBBY unit should not go Insane.

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**So, whattaya think? Good? Bad? In between? I've got several others done, and will maybe be posting them, too... I'll take suggestions for the others (especially Logan and his partners..), and if you'd like me to include some of the "bad guys" they've put up with, I'll consider it...**


	2. ALEX

**NOT MINE. Got the idea from a Teen Titans fic, the author of which got it from some other author...**

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**ALEX: Owner's Guide and Instruction Manual**

Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of a new, fully automated ALEX unit. To ensure you get the full benefits of the Partner, please pay close attention to the following instructions.

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**Basic Information:**

Name: ALEXANDRA

Date of Manufacture: 35-45 years ago

Place of Manufacture: East Coast, I think.

Height: Something over five feet, but she doesn't like to talk about it.

Weight: That's a sensitive subject, although she's lost most of the extra from being a surrogate for her sister several years ago.

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**Your** **ALEX**** unit will come with the following accessories:**

One (1) SUV

One (1) Pet bird Polly

One (1) BOBBY-English dictionary.

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**Programming:**

Your ALEX unit is a reasonably versatile unit that can perform various tasks.

**Partner:** (Default Program) ALEX units are totally dedicated to BOBBY units, with little subtlety about their feelings. Is best with BOBBY units when said BOBBY unit is in his Emo, Detective, or Happy setting.

**Mother: **ALEX units, like many other mother units, are able to perform motherly tasks.

**Sister:** ALEX units have sister units, which can do the same things as an ALEX unit, except that they don't understand BOBBY units as well.

**Member of the Major Case Squad: **Your ALEX unit becomes partners with BOBBY and helps him solve crimes.

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**Your ALEX unit has four (4) settings:**

**Happy: **Default Setting

**Angry:** Whenever a BOBBY unit does not tell her he is undercover and she comes close to blowing his head off. Or when she feels she is viewed as a "water carrier"…

**Comforting: **When a BOBBY unit is in distress.

**Rant: **When she disagrees with a criminal or a BOBBY or ROSS unit.

**WARNING: **If your ALEX unit's face turns, red get away.

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**Relations with other units:**

Your ALEX unit may be hostile to strangers at first until she assesses that they are not a threat to her, but is generally compatible with many units once she gets to know them.

**BOBBY:** Most compatible unit. ALEX units are totally dedicated to BOBBY units and often work best when your BOBBY unit is in his Emo, Detective or Happy setting.

**ROSS: **ROSS units get along fairly well with ALEX units, unless very frustrated with an ALEX or a BOBBY unit…

**DEAKINS: **DEAKINS units tend to like ALEX units, though not as much as a BOBBY unit does.

**NICOLE WALLACE:** We strongly advise against coming near this unit unless you wish to cause mental stress to an ALEX unit.

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**Cleaning:**

Your ALEX unit is fully capable of cleaning herself. But if you wish to do it yourself, do not machine wash, do not tumble dry, and do not hang on the line to dry.

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**Energy:**

Since solving crimes and running around keeping up with BOBBY uses up a lot of energy, ensure that she is fed thrice daily.

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**Frequently Asked Questions:**

Q: My ALEX unit just saw a BOBBY unit point a gun to her head. Now what?

A: A battle of words is about to start. Evacuate everywhere within a 1 to 2-mile radius.

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**Troubleshooting:**

Problem: Your ALEX unit has grown annoyed and will no longer talk to a BOBBY unit.

Solution: Wait it out. She is going through a mood swing. Keep her away from BOBBY units for a week or two, unless supervised by a DEAKINS unit. Or maybe a ROSS unit…

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With proper care and maintenance, your ALEX unit should be able to become a great partner to your BOBBY unit.


	3. ROSS

**NOT MINE.**

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**ROSS: Owner's Guide and Instruction Manual**

Congratulations! You are now the proud owner of a new, fully automated ROSS unit. To ensure you get the full benefits of the Captain, please pay close attention to the following instructions.

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**Basic Information:**

Name: DANIEL ROSS

Date of Manufacture: 30-40 years ago

Place of Manufacture: East Coast, we think.

Height: Something between five and six feet.

Weight: We aren't really sure.

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**Your** **ROSS**** unit will come with the following accessories:**

One (1) Ex-Wife

Two (2) Sons

One (1) BOBBY-English dictionary.

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**Programming:**

Your ROSS unit is a reasonably versatile unit that can perform various tasks.

**Captain:** (Default Program) ROSS units are usually good captains, but sometimes get too involved with suspects…

**Father: **ROSS units, like many other father units, are able to perform fatherly tasks.

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**Your ROSS unit has four (4) settings:**

**Captain/Crabby: **Default Setting

**Happy: **When a case is solved.

**Angry:** Whenever a BOBBY unit does not obey orders.

**Rant: **When he disagrees with a BOBBY unit.

**WARNING: **If your ROSS unit's face turns red, get away.

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**Relations with other units:**

Your ROSS unit may be hostile to strangers at first until he assesses that they are not a threat to him, but is generally compatible with many units once he gets to know them.

**RODGERS:** Most compatible unit, we think…

**ALEX: **ROSS units get along fairly well with ALEX units, unless very frustrated with an ALEX or a BOBBY unit…

**BOBBY: **BOBBY units tend to like ROSS units, though not as much as an ALEX unit does.

**CARVER: **ROSS units are relatively compatible with CARVER units, and work best with them when both units like a suspect for a crime.

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**Cleaning:**

Your ROSS unit is fully capable of cleaning himself. But if you wish to do it yourself, do not machine wash, do not tumble dry, and do not hang on the line to dry.

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**Energy:**

Since observing criminals, filing paperwork, and lecturing BOBBY uses up a lot of energy, ensure that he is fed thrice daily.

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**Frequently Asked Questions:**

Q: My ROSS unit just saw a BOBBY unit break a rule. Now what?

A: A battle of words is about to start. Evacuate everywhere within a 1 to 2-mile radius and make sure an ALEX unit is nearby.

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**Troubleshooting:**

Problem: Your ROSS unit has grown annoyed and is about to yell at a BOBBY unit.

Solution: Wait it out. This is a daily process.

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With proper care and maintenance, your ROSS unit should be a great Captain.

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**Suggestions are welcome.**


End file.
